I hope everyone’s new year has kicked off with a great start! As you guys probably know, I had a lot of things going on in my personal life that has effected the frequency of posts being posted on here. But fear not, a lot of those things are being put to rest, so I’ll be back on track hopefully posting more than I have been recently! Just to give you all a bit of un update on The Life of Lil, I thought I’d tell you about everything that’s happened since Christmas, and will be happening in the very near future.
First off, I mentioned in one of my first posts of 2017 that I’d applied to be a supervisor at my current workplace. The interview was really positive and enjoyable, and the support I had from friends and family alike was incredible! Sadly, I didn’t get the position. I am deeply gutted because I care so much about the company I work for, the shop I’m based at is my second home and I just wanted to give more than I already do. But – I am so incredibly happy for whoever does end up getting the position. It’s an incredible place to work at and they probably know how lovely everyone in our team is, so I’m positive they’ll thrive with the opportunity given. And continuing on this year’s theme of positivity – there’s always next time for me.
But having said that, I’m actually going to London for the Lush Summit next week! The managers of my store and another store were asked to rally up a few of their best sales assistants to send off to London to demonstrate how to run a 5* Store. I was one of the lucky ones that actually got picked! Everyone in our store delivers incredible customer service and has impressive feedback from customers, so it’s honestly such an honour to be given this opportunity to represent Lush (Spa) Cardiff! So even though I am gutted I didn’t get the supervisor position, I feel like the job I’m doing now is something I’m good at, something I thrive at. And out of everything, work gives me the most stability outside of my home/family life. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I’m glad I get to keep doing what I’m doing, but I will most definitely be looking to keep moving forward in life and in Lush for as long as I possibly can.
Another thing that’s been quite interesting is having my younger b
brother, Ethan, (who is 10 years younger than me), opening his very own Facebook profile. I honestly haven’t felt so old in my entire life until Ethan added me on Facebook at about 10pm one night. He’s just so techie, he literally knows how to use the internet more than I do. He didn’t tell anyone that he had Facebook, only me and our dad – he hid it from my step mum for such a long time. But of course, he caved and told her eventually. Since he’s got Facebook, we’ve been talking a lot more and it’s given us the chance to bon
d and reach out to each other a bit more too. He doesn’t spend all of his time online, which is good – he still gets out and about and has a life outside of the internet – but I do feel like it’s given us the chance to hang out, even when we’re not hanging out. Sometimes I’m super busy with work and don’t leave until gone 9pm some nights, so it’s nice to be able to have a little chat with my baby brother via Facebook before we both head off to bed. Sometimes he’s bored at a family or friends house and just wants to chat, so he’ll call and entertain me. It just makes me feel closer to him and that our age gap isn’t so huge. I don’t think anyone would believe the shock I felt when I saw ‘Ethan Added you as a friend!’ pop up on my phone that night though! I half screamed and half laughed out of confusion and fear! But so far my little problem child has been responsible and hilarious online. I’m enjoying the little things now before Ethan grows up and thinks it’s uncool to be best friends with me. That will be a sad day indeed when that happens.
Speaking of spending time with Ethan, we went to my Grandma’s birthday meal on the Sunday just gone. We of course got to spend time with our Grandma, our Uncles Andrew and John, John’s wife, Lucy and her sons and wife Adam, Mark and Cat, our cousins, Emma, Steve and Chris – our second cousins (I don’t know how cousins work, but basically Emma’s kids? I don’t know if that would make them my second cousins or what but they’re my cousins) Keira and Logan, and of course our cousins partners Lauren, Kayleigh and Jason. The only person missing was my Granddad – he’s still in the hospital after his recent stroke, which is absolutely heartbreaking, but we made sure that Grandma had a nice few hours away from all of that heartache just to celebrate her and her life. We made sure that Grandpa was constantly brought up in conversation and a part of our conversations throughout the day just like he would be if he were there. It was overall a really lovely way to band together as a strong and united family unit and support each other through a difficult time for one of the strongest ladies I’ve ever had the honour of knowing.
Another thing that’s been frustrating me lately is university. It’s gotten to the point where it’s actually ridiculous the amount of work we’re NOT doing. We’re not learning anything new and I’m getting myself into debt for the second year of my course, for apparently no reason. It became so stressful and the organisation was just so messy that I’ve decided not to go until it sorts itself out. There is no point in putting myself and my mental wellbeing out there to be damaged by the amount of stress for the little work we do end up doing. Some days we end up going into a ‘lecture’ for up to four hours just to log into Facebook and message each other until we’re allowed to go. So I thought ‘Hey, this isn’t what I’m paying for so I’m not doing this anymore’, so I stopped. We’ve been battling for the entire month of January for someone to reply to us regarding this issue and only a day ago did someone eventually reply. It doesn’t look like things will change anytime soon and if I do go back, I doubt very much my feelings will change and that my wellbeing will deteriorate even more. It’s so bad that even the idea of looking through emails for university makes me want to heave. It’s even effecting my sleep. Since the end of December I’ve had awfully bad insomnia. It started off staying away for a few more hours than I normally would, which is perfectly normal for people to do every now and then. But it’s gradually progressed until I’m not sleeping soundly until 5:30/6:30/7am and even then, I’ll be waking up at 11am at the latest to go to work or to at least attempt to go to uni. I’ve made myself sick with stress because of all of this and the insomnia is just further irritating me.
I’ll have good days and bad days with the insomnia, good days are when I get to sleep just after 1:30/2am and then get to have a nap during the day. Bad days are when I’m running on 30 minutes – 1 hour’s sleep. My GP told me this is normal for people suffering from severe stress and it’s a side effect for one of the tablets I take to help with my cyclothymia – however university shouldn’t be causing me this much distress. I just hate the current situation I’m in because of university and my insomnia. I can’t even access help for my Mental Health problems through the university because no one is available for me to see when I’m available. It’s like all of the help I’m entitled to, just isn’t accessible which sucks. My university sucks even more. I honestly wish I’d never gone to USW in the first place. My broken body doesn’t help the situation right now either. But at least with my body, I know it will heal and improve. Everything else is uncertain.
You’ll probably remember that I’ve set a theme for this year for myself, which is positivity. So I’m trying not to let the bad things such as university, insomnia and the such get to me too much. But it also means I’ve got something incredibly exciting and positive to announce to you all very soon.
I’m currently working on something life changing for me called The Purple Project. You may recognise the name from a little competition I attempted to run in December. However, I’ve been inspired to expand and create a more positive impact through The Purple Project along with a few very special people. I can’t announce anything just yet, but I hope to be able to reveal everything within the next couple of weeks. I’m so excited for this and I’m finally feeling like this is what I’m meant to be doing. I’m so excited to let you all know what is about to happen! To maybe get a hint of what’s to come, follow me on all my social media which is always linked here on my blog, and I’ll leave my user names below this post too. So to summarise, The Purple Project is coming. It’s something more than before, and it’s here to stay. It’s exciting, powerful and it’s about to make a change.
Well that’s everything I can think of for now! I’m sorry if this post seemed a bit rubbish. I just haven’t done one of these in a while so I thought it would be nice to reflect on what’s happened since 2017 actually started, good and bad. I’m honestly looking forward to this year more than anything. Let me know what’s been going on with you so far in 2017 and see if you can take a guess as to what The Purple Project is this time… (no spoilers from those that know!). Until next time, have an awfully big adventure!
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